Radical Georgia Moderate

You know what’s more goddamn fun than nearly anything else in the goddamn world? Making the goddamn Baby Jesus cry. Long story short, there was some humping in a goddamn church parking lot last night, and a latex present for the church’s goddamn janitor in one of the parking spaces. That was post-trivia, and post-many Sweetwaters, of-goddamn-course.

Any-goddamn-hoo…

What’s going on in the goddamn world today? Aside from me tying on many-a-plenty goddamn beers again despite only three hours of goddamn sleep (mostly due to all the goddamn fucking)?

Here’s a goddamn joke for you: the AJC headline reads Perdue, legislators vow action on eminent domain (login). Yet, it was those same goddamn legislators who were pushing for eminent domain to be tacked on to their goddamn public-private partnership bill. Goddamn whichever way the wind blows flipfloppers. At least the AJC article EVENTUALLY got around to mentioning that little goddamn fact:

Democrats argue that GOP leaders are being hypocrites on the issue, since many Republicans unsuccessfully pushed Senate Bill 5 earlier this year - legislation that critics said would encourage the use of eminent domain to acquire land for economic development projects.

Of course, that wasn’t until the eighth goddamn graf, with 290 goddamn words already in the bag. Stupid goddamn peoples’ attention spans dwindle after about 200 goddamn words, so chances are there weren’t a lot of readers who even got to that part.

They’re behaving like a bunch of goddamn big government liberals. I’d be laughing if it weren’t so goddamn anti-American at its core. So, they’ve already decided to make it their job to mandate some goddamn steroid testing in Major League Baseball, and now they’re threatening to take away baseball’s antitrust protections simply because they don’t like one of the goddamn bidders for the goddamn Washington Nationals. Who would those commies dare raise such a goddamn fuss over, as quoted by the goddamn Washington Post (login)?

Major League Baseball hasn’t narrowed the list of the eight bidders seeking to buy the Washington Nationals and some Republicans on Capitol Hill already are hinting at revoking the league’s antitrust exemption if billionaire financier George Soros , an ardent critic of President Bush and supporter of liberal causes, buys the team.

You don’t get to call yourself a goddamn fiscal conservative if you believe the government should block a goddamn business deal just because you don’t agree with the buyer’s goddamn political beliefs (assuming that buyer isn’t breaking any goddamn laws, which this one is not). And you don’t get to call yourself a goddamn (language perverting buzzword alert) traditional values conservative if you want to destroy America’s pastime, which is what lifting the goddamn antitrust exemption would do.

So here’s your first goddamn commie quote of the day:

“It’s not necessarily smart business sense to have anybody who is so polarizing in the political world,” Rep. John E. Sweeney (R-N.Y.) said. “That goes for anybody, but especially as it relates to Major League Baseball because it’s one of the few businesses that get incredibly special treatment from Congress and the federal government.”

And your next goddamn commie quote:

Rep. Tom M. Davis III (R-Va.), who was a strong supporter of bringing a baseball team to Virginia, told Roll Call yesterday that “Major League Baseball understands the stakes” if Soros buys the team. “I don’t think they want to get involved in a political fight.”

As pointed to somewhere in the article, is the goddamn Congress going to get involved every goddamn time teams want to trade players? Every goddamn time a team wants to fire a goddamn manager? Goddamn, what hubris on these pigfuckers.

I like designing banners for theme weeks because it makes them feel more official. In the case of 20-Goddamn-Per-Post Week, the thought crossed my mind there might be other like-minded heathens who’d enjoy participating in a similar goddamn-overuse exercise. It’s fun and therapeutic! Say it out loud to yourself. It’s almost as versatile as fuck.

• The goddamn Braves have a winning record again this year, but we all know Bobby Cox will choke in the goddamn playoffs again.
• I don’t give a good goddamn about the goddamn color of the goddamn place mats! Just pick a goddamn color and don’t ever ask me for interior decorating advice again, goddamn it!
• It’s a goddamn shame I’ll miss church on Sunday. And every Sunday from here on out. My soul needs some goddamn therapy after that hooker laced my blow and gave me a goddamn Drano enema.
• I’m going to download iTunes 4.9 today so I can see what the goddamn hype is about.
• The goddamn president will be on TV tonight to blow more goddamn smoke up our collective goddamn asses pertaining to the deteriorating goddamn situation in the ground fighting resulting from his noble goddamn lie.

Anyway, point is, feel free to pilfer the banner and the 20-Goddamn-Per-Post Week idea. The banner is a mostly black and white GIF file with a transparent background, so it will match close to any goddamn decor.

UPDATE: Here’s some bonus goddamns for you. This quote is from H. Ray Newman Sr., a spokesman for the Georgia Baptist Convention’s ethics and Public Affairs division, as quoted by the AJC in this article (login) about counties trying to interpret rulings on Ten (goddamn) Commandments displays:

“We would like to see God acknowledged in the public arena,” Newman said. “But by removing the commandments from the courthouse walls, they’re saying we will not be able to do it. If it’s on display, I don’t believe the government is telling us we have to believe in God. It simply acknowledges that there is a God.”

For those looking for a prime example of who I’m referring to when I mention a goddamn theocrat, look no further. Would that equivocating goddamn windbag say the same thing if verses from the goddamn Quran were posted in front of the courthouse? I think not. Goddamn hypocritical lying goddamn bullshitter.

Why, goddamn it, must fate have chosen this goddamn moment to hand an unprecedented amount of clout to one goddamn president? If your eyes have been shut for the past two years, George W. Goddamn Bush will likely have the power to appoint at least one and possibly as many as three goddamn Supreme Court Justices. The country hasn’t been more polarized during my goddamn lifetime. Maybe I wasn’t paying attention when Reagan was president and this goddamn conservative revolution developed legs. Or maybe, goddamn it, these wheels have been in motion for a half goddamn century and nobody noticed.

I hate to get all gloom and doom on you in my drunken goddamn stupor, but there’s a lot of goddamn culture-changing shit likely to be presented to the highest goddamn court in the land over the next decade. Just check this goddamn article. We’re inching toward a goddamn theocracy, if you haven’t noticed. Goddamn it. And Rehnquist is a flaming granola-eating commie liberal compared to the goddamn maniacs waiting in line to be the next justice.

The word goddamn popped up a lot this post because I’ve decided this week will be 20-goddamn-per-post week. So, expect there to be excessive use of the word goddamn.

There’s nothing mature or intellectual or valuable or strategically sound about this, it’s just a week-long Fuck You to the goddamn theocrats.

That’s duct tape on the air hose, oh yeah.

I should have left for work five minutes ago, but then I noticed this article (login). Check it out. I’m somewhat optimistic Reed is overestimating his clout in suburbia, for reasons I may or may not go into later.

I don’t have time to write anything, just go read this Frank Rich column (login) in the NY Times. Apparently, taxpayer dollars are being use to assemble a blacklist of journalists based on pro- are anti-Bush Administration views.

It’s hard to fault the logic behind Governor Sonny Perdue’s proposal of a constitutional amendment to protect Georgia Lottery revenue from being funneled into other projects, except for one thing: why on earth does EVERYTHING have to be a constitutional amendment now? My understanding of what a constitution is supposed to be is a document that frames the structure of a government, not one that delves into the minutiae of day-to-day expenses. I’d love for there to be a law with clear wording that’d be difficult for legislators looking to dip their grubby hands in the lotto pot to weasel around, but all these amendment proposals seem excessive.

It’s a transparent attempt to take a campaign issue away from Mark Taylor anyway, since that’s been a big part of his shtick for a long time. I guess they’re worried about the dough his campaign has brought in so far.

UPDATE: God, they’re all hypocrites. First of all, past governor Roy Barnes had already pushed a constitutional amendment through in 1998 assuring HOPE got first dibs on all lotto revenue. Obviously, I wasn’t aware of that when I wrote my original post. So Perdue’s amendment is 100 percent unnecessary.

Next, both Taylor and Perdue are guilty of spearheading and/or voting for non-school programs with lotto money: Perdue with his $1.7 million gaeducation411.com website, and Taylor with a $2 million education center in a park in his hometown of Albany.

Anyway… I don’t think I’ve ever seen more arrows than there are on that website (screenshot). It’s comforting to know Georgia taxpayers got their money’s worth out of that arrow template.

Read the latest AJC article (login).

I‘m a little ashamed to say I wasn’t aware of his historical relevance in broadcasting until I read his AJC obituary (login). I always knew him as the guy whose columns showed up on the Marietta Daily Journal’s opinion page next to Bill Shipp and Dick Yarbrough. Truth be told, I didn’t think his columns were all that great. But it’s hard to deny him a spot in local history as the man most single-handedly responsible for making WSB radio into the powerhouse it was for a long time. He apparently originated some of the concepts prevalent in talk radio now, including frequent weather reports and audience call-ins. From the WSB History page:

If one person can be called the most influential person in radio broadcasting in the Southeast in modern times, it would have to be Elmo Ellis. In his years working with WSB in Atlanta (1940 through 1982), Elmo Ellis was a man who recognized that radio had two roles. Yes, radio was a business but radio also had a responsibility to inform and guide listeners. In his roles as program director and later as the General Manager of WSB, he balanced those two roles to preserve WSB’s position as a dominant source of news and information – while also providing listeners with memorable entertainment programs.

I‘ve been trying to figure out what the big fuss was over Karl Rove’s remarks reported over the last day or two. The biggest problem with how Democrats reacted, as I see it, is that they’re not embracing what Rove said. It’s as if being told “you’re not willing to send troops to shoot brown-skinned people before you’ve accumulated evidence they’ve done anything wrong” was some sort of insult. The biggest distinction between the neo-cons and their opposition is that one believes in what amounts to vigilante justice, while one believes in the American idea of justice. The former is fine for movie screens and pulp novels, but not for maintaining any sort of order in the world. It’s a dead-end strategy in the long-run that will just lead to costly, perpetual war. And, I’d add, it’s markedly similar in its attitude and principles to those of the people who attacked this country to begin with. That’s a difference Democrats should embrace, not shy away from.